Acting FAQ - Welcome to Hollywood
Acting Career FAQ - Welcome to Hollywood by Bob Fraser
Since this month marks the start of the yearly influx of "new talent," to our community, let me be the 1st old-timer to welcome you to Tinseltown.
Here are three other old-timers with advice (and a warning or two):
"Behind the phony tinsel of Hollywood lies the real tinsel."
~ Oscar Levant
"Half the people in Hollywood are dying to be discovered and the other half are afraid they will be." ~ Lionel Barrymore
"You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and stuff it in the navel of a gnat ... and still have room left over for three caraway seeds and an agent's heart." ~ Fred Allen
Well, these stalwarts are unlikely to be topped by the likes of me, but I will add my 24 cents (adjusted for inflation).
First, Fred Allen's remark. This quote is generally reported with two significant differences; "firefly" in the first instance and "producer" in the second. I actually heard Fred Allen utter this remark back in the fifties – on a television show called Masquerade Party – and I've got it right. I know, because I wrote it down – and I still have that piece of paper. (Am I anal retentive? Can we talk?)
And just listen to the alliteration ... "navel of a gnat,"
then consider the difference between a producer (who’s usually a 'true-believer') and an agent. Need I say more?
Bottom Line? My version is correct and the one that you can find all over the internet must be a first draft.
Anyway, back to the subject at hand; like my predecessors, I have some advisories (warnings) for you.
1. Don't listen to the advice of other actors who are just getting started themselves. If you listen, you will hear a lot of bovine fecal matter – much of which starts with the words, "In this town..." Most of this balloon juice is useless – and sometimes worse.
2. Find a decent place to live. Living in a garret is all right if you’re a French impressionist painter – but living like a starving artist is a good way to become a starving artist and stay that way for a long time. Unlike painters, actors are rarely discovered after they’re dead.
3. Take classes. There are two very good reasons for this.
First you will learn a lot from the acting teachers here in LA. (There are many good ones.) And secondly, you will begin to meet people. Since our business is one of constant collaboration, it's a good idea to get started on this part of your career immediately.
4. TCB. Take care of business. What this means is looking out for your finances in a realistic way, budgeting for your career needs, saving for a rainy day (you'd be surprised how many people think it doesn't rain in LaLaLand - it does… and often), and generally acting like a responsible business person. Even if that's not you, ACT like it is.
5. Take care of yourself. Stay healthy. Although, thanks to technology, there are increasing opportunities for dead actors, why go to that extreme just to get another credit?
Eat well, exercise, drive carefully and don't ingest too much. (Food, drink or drugs.)
6. Relax. This is probably going to take awhile – and there might be some pain involved. Keep in mind that pain is inevitable, misery is optional. Breathe deeply. Take up a hobby. Pay attention to the rest of the world. Anxiety, frustration and worry will not make things go any faster.
7. Be nice to others. This sneaky ploy works in all walks of life.
8. Don't become a critic. We have plenty of critics already and they add very little to the product we sell. A lot of newcomers think that they will impress others with their criticism of successful productions - that it's a way to look smart. Believe me, you won't impress and you won't look smart. You'll just come off as an amateur wannabe.
Instead, do what the stars do. Smile and say what the stars
say: "That was quite a picture!" "Well, what can I say - amazing!" "You really had me going there." Etc. This is not called lying, this is called professional courtesy.
9. Decide that you're here because you want to act for money.
Workshops, Equity-waiver, experimental films, etc. are all fine to keep your ‘instrument' tuned - but they can quickly become a way of life if you are not determined to make money at this. Be careful out there.
10. Try making a plan. I know this is a lot like homework, but the results of sitting down for a few hours and really determining what you want out of your acting career, are truly amazing. Remember, "A bad plan, vigorously executed, is better than no plan at all." ~ Patton (the general, not the actor)
Well, ten is a nice round number…
But if I were to go on to eleven, it would be this:
Do everything you can to be a happy person, right now. If you think you can grouse today and then be happy someday...
in the future, I'm here to tell you that happiness just doesn't work that way. Putting off happiness until 'someday' lasts forever.
If you can't be happy where you are, it's a cinch you can't be happy where you ain't.
Okay, now you are warned and advised. Go be wonderful.
Since this month marks the start of the yearly influx of "new talent," to our community, let me be the 1st old-timer to welcome you to Tinseltown.
Here are three other old-timers with advice (and a warning or two):
"Behind the phony tinsel of Hollywood lies the real tinsel."
~ Oscar Levant
"Half the people in Hollywood are dying to be discovered and the other half are afraid they will be." ~ Lionel Barrymore
"You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and stuff it in the navel of a gnat ... and still have room left over for three caraway seeds and an agent's heart." ~ Fred Allen
Well, these stalwarts are unlikely to be topped by the likes of me, but I will add my 24 cents (adjusted for inflation).
First, Fred Allen's remark. This quote is generally reported with two significant differences; "firefly" in the first instance and "producer" in the second. I actually heard Fred Allen utter this remark back in the fifties – on a television show called Masquerade Party – and I've got it right. I know, because I wrote it down – and I still have that piece of paper. (Am I anal retentive? Can we talk?)
And just listen to the alliteration ... "navel of a gnat,"
then consider the difference between a producer (who’s usually a 'true-believer') and an agent. Need I say more?
Bottom Line? My version is correct and the one that you can find all over the internet must be a first draft.
Anyway, back to the subject at hand; like my predecessors, I have some advisories (warnings) for you.
1. Don't listen to the advice of other actors who are just getting started themselves. If you listen, you will hear a lot of bovine fecal matter – much of which starts with the words, "In this town..." Most of this balloon juice is useless – and sometimes worse.
2. Find a decent place to live. Living in a garret is all right if you’re a French impressionist painter – but living like a starving artist is a good way to become a starving artist and stay that way for a long time. Unlike painters, actors are rarely discovered after they’re dead.
3. Take classes. There are two very good reasons for this.
First you will learn a lot from the acting teachers here in LA. (There are many good ones.) And secondly, you will begin to meet people. Since our business is one of constant collaboration, it's a good idea to get started on this part of your career immediately.
4. TCB. Take care of business. What this means is looking out for your finances in a realistic way, budgeting for your career needs, saving for a rainy day (you'd be surprised how many people think it doesn't rain in LaLaLand - it does… and often), and generally acting like a responsible business person. Even if that's not you, ACT like it is.
5. Take care of yourself. Stay healthy. Although, thanks to technology, there are increasing opportunities for dead actors, why go to that extreme just to get another credit?
Eat well, exercise, drive carefully and don't ingest too much. (Food, drink or drugs.)
6. Relax. This is probably going to take awhile – and there might be some pain involved. Keep in mind that pain is inevitable, misery is optional. Breathe deeply. Take up a hobby. Pay attention to the rest of the world. Anxiety, frustration and worry will not make things go any faster.
7. Be nice to others. This sneaky ploy works in all walks of life.
8. Don't become a critic. We have plenty of critics already and they add very little to the product we sell. A lot of newcomers think that they will impress others with their criticism of successful productions - that it's a way to look smart. Believe me, you won't impress and you won't look smart. You'll just come off as an amateur wannabe.
Instead, do what the stars do. Smile and say what the stars
say: "That was quite a picture!" "Well, what can I say - amazing!" "You really had me going there." Etc. This is not called lying, this is called professional courtesy.
9. Decide that you're here because you want to act for money.
Workshops, Equity-waiver, experimental films, etc. are all fine to keep your ‘instrument' tuned - but they can quickly become a way of life if you are not determined to make money at this. Be careful out there.
10. Try making a plan. I know this is a lot like homework, but the results of sitting down for a few hours and really determining what you want out of your acting career, are truly amazing. Remember, "A bad plan, vigorously executed, is better than no plan at all." ~ Patton (the general, not the actor)
Well, ten is a nice round number…
But if I were to go on to eleven, it would be this:
Do everything you can to be a happy person, right now. If you think you can grouse today and then be happy someday...
in the future, I'm here to tell you that happiness just doesn't work that way. Putting off happiness until 'someday' lasts forever.
If you can't be happy where you are, it's a cinch you can't be happy where you ain't.
Okay, now you are warned and advised. Go be wonderful.
posted by Dominique Jackson @ 5:52 PM
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